Local Man Too Far Into Friendship With Classmate Whose Name He Doesn't Know

Chad White, I’ll Get It Eventually, Is It Dave?


CHATTANOOGA, TN – A local student has gotten in too deep when it came to his friendship with a guy whose name he thinks is Steve.

Junior Charlie Oglesbee met the other student in Intro to Psychology last fall. The two hit it off instantly but when Oglesbee asked the other student his name, the class volume raised to an extremely high level. Oglesbee was too afraid to confirm the student’s name.

“I’m 83% sure he said Steve. Or maybe it was Jim” said Oglesbee “Fuck it. I don’t know.”

Following the class, the two began to see each other around campus. Probably Steve would scream out Oglesbee’s name who would have nothing to retort except for “hey bud” and “what up big dawg?”

Now the men are in the same Applied Developmental Psychology class, sitting only a few rows from each other. Oglesbee tried the tactic of waiting until the teacher called roll to find out the student’s name but he missed it due to an unexpected sneeze from across the room.

“I have another idea where I ask to see his Mocs ID so I can sign him up for my fictitious intramural football team” said Oglesbee frantically looking for the signup sheet that already had fake students on them which includes the likes of Saggitariutt Jefferspin, X-Wing @Aliciousness, and Swirvithan L'Goodling-Splatt.

At press time, Oglesbee believes Steve’s name to still be Steve or maybe even Andy.